Writing the dialogue journal was an original experience in my life, and brought me some results I didn’t expect. First, because I thought writing frequently would be difficult, but we were free to discuss what we preferred; thou Carla sometimes pointed us the topics, we could develop them our way. It was also a grammar activity because it made us use what we knew, notice what we didn’t and remember some spellings. And, specially, we could reflect on our condition, possibilities, responsibilities – and change somehow our guidelines in order to help us better in our learning.

Everything in the classes, from the round table, which was really new, thou we commonly organize chairs in a circle in other classes, to the didactic material composed by literature, films and paintings. Using English was a fantastic experience, once we normally only fill gaps and read the answers loud. So we could learn not only English, but about everything we talked about, and could make the classes interesting and even talk about what we wanted to, as in an informal situation or friend talking.

The kind of work we developed this semester also made me understand the importance of all the members in the group performance, how the collective experience is important to build up knowledge, how dialoguing can lead students further by creative interaction, once we’ll have more points of view so we can ‘surround’ the problems more completely than we’d do alone.

And the dialogue was not only among students, we could have it with the teacher, what could guarantee the best assistance we could receive. We felt ‘safe’ someone would be there to help us, so instead of complaining out of the class about what happened there and trying to solve the doubts with a classmate, we could discuss in the classroom what our needs were.

I am really satisfied with the classes we had and with discovering my wish of studying in this environment. I think this could be the beginning of a reaching experience, once we’re undergraduate students to be teachers, but to go further in that reflection, we need to solve our problems as students first.

Edna St. Vincent Millay

"My candle burns at both ends;
It will not last the night;
But ah, my foes, and oh, my friends --
It gives a lovely light! "

http://query.nytimes.com/gst/fullpage.html?res=9E0DE6D61430F933A0575BC0A9679C8B63&sec=&spon=&pagewanted=all

In this NY Times Article I had a small first contact with Edna St. Vincent Millay, who, according to the newspaper, "was a rock star, the Madonna of her time."
I found this article when I was looking in the internet for some more about that poem, which I found absolutely beautiful. Sometimes I feel like this: Living the greatest part of the year and having thrill moments, I know they won´t last forever, but as long as they last, they give a lovely light.
Yet I didn´t find a good interpretation about it. In my mind it sounds great and it kind of tells us to enjoy life as we can, instead of keep putting things off everytime. Of course we should be very careful and patient about our plans, but, at the same time, we must know that life is so fragile and sometimes we won´t have a second chance to learn, to teach, to talk, to live.
I´d like you, my friends, to tell me what´s your opinion about this, and how you prefer your candle to burn, and the reason of it.

Cheating on me

Today I realized that this expression can clearly define what I´ve being doing to myself since I first entered college. At first, I´m always pretty sure about my choices: If I´m studying Civil Engineering it´s because I want to be a Civil Engineer, I know what he does and I´ve done some talking with real ones to know how they feel about their profession, but then, out of sudden, during the first third of the course I get completely demotivated in front of all difficulties and it sounds easier to me to come to the conclusion that I don´t like the course and that I probably won´t enjoy that profession as well. But so far the problem isn´t so big, after all, we can´t keep studying what we don´t like, it just goes against the right reasons of doing something.

My major problem is in not being disciplined even when I´m completely sure that I´m doing what I like and there´s nothing else I´d rather being doing instead. What happens is that I get myself too much committed to what I like, and I generally like more than two things at once, so I get hardly devoted to a lot of things at the same time. In the beginning, while I´m still full of energy and absorbed by the shine of those new things and can handle them. It works perfectly well for me when I find myself stuck into a routine. If everyday I do the same things at the same time I could keep doing it endlessly, but as we all know, things are always changing, and when I´m not able to do that thing I used to do at a certain time because I really have to do something new instead, then the risk of stop doing that old thing just because I left that cycle is huge. What´s worse is that I actually like that thing and I miss doing it, but I just don´t have the required courage to take the first step again. This can be applied to almost everything I do: studies, this blog, my workouts on gym, and even to friends.

You probably must be thinking that I have a laziness issue. But it is not, I like working, it makes me feel great. There´s nothing that happier to me than seeing a well done job being finished, and It doesn´t need to be something special, I become proud of finishing a homework, a research, a physical exercise and even a set of dishes in my mom´s kitchen sink. My big problem is about DISCIPLINE, I need it, and it won´t be a well done schedule that will give it to me, I have already tried to set time to things that need to be done, but I can cheat on me again and keep postponing my scheduled times. Only routine and discipline can oblige me, and I certainly have to be stronger in what concerns the discipline. I´d better start to think about things that have to be done as they were unable to be done tomorrow: or I do them today or I won´t have another opportunity. After all, most of us (and I´m included there) don´t know how to appreciate the value of one thing until the day we lose it.

Round Table Class

This semester, for the very first time I´m having classes in this format. We students can sit in the same chair that our teacher sits, there´s not a pre-marked spot were we can´t put ourselves in; we just choose our place every time we get in the classroom. This makes a huge difference in what concerns our motivation and confidence. Sitting as equals we have this clear message that the responsibility of learning has the same weight in everyone´s shoulders. We´re all supposed to be there helping each other in this learning journey. Every single student has his/her particular way of being and background of knowledge, nobody can miss a class or everybody will loose a little bit. We´re constructing classes and being a huge part in it. When we attend to classes like this we are not just people who are obliged to be there for his/her own sake. We´re going to class for everyone there.

We obviously need to have a superior teacher that will lead us in our road. The difference there is just that even being in a superior position, our teaches seems to care so much about what we feel like learning and ask us to help her making clear what is important for us or not, instead of just being there and giving all those grammar and English lectures that the book tells to. We can just skip what isn´t important and stay focus to our real needs and difficulties.

I always feel proud when I´m talking to someone else (even someone outside UFPB) about my English III classes, it´s just like if Carla had developed this new way of teaching and we´re the luck ones who are able to make part of it.

This one is some weeks late :D

Last week in class we saw Picasso´s "Guernica". This painting depicts the German bombing of the city with the same name during the Spanish Civil War in 1937. It certainly is a complex and geniously made masterpiece, but instead of keep me thinking about arts and all its possible interpretations, it brought me thoughts about human kind and all the suffering we can cause or can´t stop. "No, la pintura no está hecha para decorar las habitaciones. Es un instrumento de guerra ofensivo y defensivo contra el enemigo." (Pablo Picasso)

I don´t know if you´re aware of, but my mother works in a hospital as a nurse and I´m working as a intern Criminal Lawer. Thus, I´ve been seeing, during this year, lots of people that are living in deep suffering: sick people that can´t afford nor it´s offered to them the ideal treatment, and enjailed people that, for the same reasons, can´t make use of their Constitutional right of defense. In our jobs we try as much as possible but it´s painful not being able to do enough to alleviate their suffering.
Having this said I´d like to reflect today about how we can use all this learning and this hours that we spend studying to make someone else happy or to compensate difficulties of their life. Teachers do this everyday, they spread knowledge and responsibility in their work. What can we students do? One thing I realized is that, first of all, we´re supposed to learn, read, talk and live as much as possible in order to get prepared to do whatever may be possible and not to waste this blessed life we have.

Something nice to practice listening.

To be or not to be...

Going to SINALE these day has been very funny. Marcia Abreu’s discourse was just cool, talking so nicely about something which is a uncomforting at Letters course: we feel tense all the time that someone will appear talking about an unknown subject and observes (based on your “no” after his/her “do you know…” question) – but you are in Letters course, and sometimes our own classmates are “bullying us”.

I feel kind of afraid of being a teacher and not having the background I’m supposed to. I mean, I don’t think I gave the ordered attention to some points and don’t feel I can answer students’ questions yet. In fact, I would like to work as a translator in future, but I feel I don’t have the basic English to read a whole book. And when I went to Carla’s, Regina’s and Betânea’s expositions I felt guilty that I am not worried enough about this aspect of my under graduation: I’m graduating to be a teacher – what will I do?

I talked to a friend today and she told me she asked her students not to talk about grammar with her, only about literature, but I don’t think that’s a good solution – or even a solution.

I don’t feel safe with Portuguese nor with English. I mean, I can get good grades but I don’t feel like really knowing that and it sounded kind of cruel when Regina asked why do teachers don’t effetely graduate as teachers, but keep on depending on extra courses later.

I asked myself how that was possible. And I remember that at the begging of the course there were certain students of whom I already had the impression that would have this destiny. Back then I wasn’t as involved as I am now with this feeling of social responsibility, I mean, I didn’t have all these expectations of ‘walls to be climbed’ by education to change people’s reality, it was as if I’d graduate and work and that was about it, no problems in getting a job or in the job. But now I have a strange wish of continuing studying here for a long time, as if I didn’t want to finish my studying, and of coming work only here, teaching people who are already able to learn with no difficulty, not facing the terrible high school out there, as if university was a beautiful dream: we know the society’s problem and tell people how to solve it, but don’t have to do it ourselves.

Fear what concerns to my job – that’s not good at all.

A little more colorfull than it looked in the print, no?

Totally 'based' - not to say stolen- on this.

Phrasal Verbs

Talking about the exercise with phrasal verbs we did last class and that we suppose to continue in the next, I always had problems with phrasal verbs and I noticed that doing the exercises, because I just knew some of them, those which came in a context. Thus, I always worried about it and I had decided that I would buy a book of expressions in English. But I put off, put off, and never bought. But, finally, three weeks ago I bought one I guess it is good; it will help a lot.

Phrasal verbs were ever the worse part of English for me; the most difficult topic to learn. But, actually, thinking now why, my process of learning it was really bad. Ok that I can’t memorize words easily, but the way I was taught (I had to know by heart pages of phrasal verbs without using them in my productions – oral or writing) made me feel more afraid of them, because I couldn’t memorize anyway.

Nowadays I know that if I want to really learn phrasal verbs I must use them every time I have opportunity; but not only to wait, passively; on the contrary, to create situations to use them.

movies

Not in English, but...

Translating movie titles.

Reflecting on the poster

The experience of producing a poster was really nice and valuable. Manly because we had an opportunity to reflect on the production of the journal, something we haven’t done yet. Doing this, we could perceive once again, and better, the meaning of our project, and its impact in our learning.
I also really enjoyed reading the texts of Cole and Bailey (we read to have inspiration to write the poster), reading other experiences documented through a journal format as we do.
But the presentation of the poster was for me a frustration; we didn’t have that moment we should have to share our experiences, learning, etc, because nobody was there, nor even to present their posters neither to see.
So, I hope that next time it be completely different.