I am very happy that this semester I’ll finish English Phonetics and Phonology. I mean, it is a normal thing to do, to course a obligatory subject, but I am kind of surprised with myself in what concerns to English. I feel I improved a lot after I started writing frequently, and I also improved my reading, and dare have a contact with the language I didn’t have before, though I knew it would benefit me, because I felt demotivated when I found something I didn’t know yet, instead of using that to add me some knowledge.
I didn’t pay the due attention to the English subjects, because we were reviewing an already too reviewed, during our whole life, basic content, and, on the other side, there was a professor who demanded from me more than I felt I was able to give.
When I was younger, have a demanding teacher helped me learning some theory, and review that theory in an English course helped me to acquire it orally, but at the university I wasn’t interested in big challenges nor, still less, in repetitive contents. But after we started writing the journal, I felt much more motivated and I found myself enjoying the subjects that, in past, made me give up of the English course, though I kept the Portuguese one.
It was good for me to talk about my difficulties and feel supported by people who had a problem alike, who were also trying to find a solution after so much time recognizing the problem and doing no more than that – we would, then, stop complaining and begin to act.
I remember in 2005.1, the professor asked me to redo a seminar, because it was too mediocre and now, in 2007.1, the same professor praised my presentation. Not only because of this, but specially because I feel motivated now, his classes became “soft”, I mean, I don’t feel “oppressed” (if I can call like this). For example, we now do the same activity we did two years ago, a reflection about each class, but I can write it with no problems, when in past I just hated and sometimes I could even cry, so stressed I became by not having what to write. The difference is that my attitude in relation to this kind of activity changed, I feel free not only to write and read, but also to reflect. I feel free to comment what I’d like to have in classes and to assume responsibility for my activities, instead of only wait for professors.
I have also to comment how the English subject, this semester, seems much better. I mean, it’s like an “anatomic” class and I notice my fluency went better though there isn’t a systematic class (or maybe there is, but not in the mould we were used to see). I really like how we work with our own material and can use English classes to discuss not only English itself, but always involving English in diversified topics, like arts or even personal things, like ironing clothes! I guess it created a good atmosphere in which we feel supported and strongly want to correspond to it giving our best.
